( in the dictionary, there's a picture of caroline forbes under the word impulsive. she has a bad habit of talking before her brain can catch up with her mouth, and the last few weeks have been no exception. honestly? she's blaming the city. a place that calls itself cuddle city, even in jest, cannot be taken seriously. or trusted, in this case.
but blaming the city doesn't mean she doesn't feel a little — okay, a lot — guilty for basically accusing derek of lying to her. and when caroline feels guilty, she does her best to squash that feeling by doing something, anything to make things right.
so, naturally, pan to the next possible evening, and a blonde girl standing in front of derek's door, an oversized gift basket in hand. knock, knock. )
[ He's not really expecting any visitors today, if only because he's got to go to work in about an hour, but then again, he's made his address pretty clear by never bothering to take it off his okCuddle profile, so there's always the chance of someone stopping by. Not to mention Scott, Stiles, or Malia.
So, he doesn't think much of it as he tugs a t-shirt on, still a little sweaty from the workout he's been doing, using doorways for pull-ups, and crosses the room to answer the door.
He does not, however, expect to see Caroline on the other side of the door, especially after the blow up over the baby who had turned out not even to be a baby at all, just a guy called Baby stuck in a toddler's body. ]
...hey.
[ His eyes shift to the gift basket before they move back up to her face and he smiles a little, stepping back and gesturing for her to come on in, if she feels so inclined. ]
( it's a good look. the t-shirt clings in just the right way, and caroline has to really focus to not outright stare. it helps, though, that he's letting her in. it gives her something else to look at, her feet somewhere to walk as she makes her way inside, gift basket settled on the nearest surface. unfortunately, that leaves her hands free, which means they're left only to wring themselves together. )
I never thought you were a shitbag... ( fingertips brush a lock of hair out of her face, and she offers a weak smile in return. ) If anyone's a jerk, it's me.
( hence the gift basket. )
I was hoping you'd accept my apology, because I'd be really bummed if you went out of your way not to ghost on me and then I screwed it up because a magical puddle made me hear voices...
[ His eyebrows lift a little at her response as she moves into his apartment. Derek can't help noticing the way she's fidgeting. Something tells him that Caroline isn't a big fan of admitting she was wrong or having to dole out apologies, deserved or otherwise. That, he can identify with. ]
No? Just a liar.
[ He smiles a little, though, shaking his head. ]
Apology accepted. This place...just consider yourself lucky you were just hearing voices instead of word vomiting too much information at anyone in your general proximity who happens to be listening. That was fun, the truth rain. Were you here for that?
( caroline groans, a pained little sound that only emphasizes just how much she's been trying to block the memory of her own shrill accusations out of her head; it's a real herculean effort to not cover her face in her hands when he brings it up again. )
Don't remind me. I still feel like such a jerk.
( but he's accepting her somewhat lame not-quite-apology, so that does help her feel a little bit better about the whole thing. )
That sounds weird... though I probably don't need truth rain to wordvomit at people. ( embarassing, but true. ) You want to take a look at that basket? I kind of spent all day trying to find things I thought you'd like, but if you hate it, I can go back and get you something else...
[ Derek smirks a little and finally reaches behind her to shut the door. ]
Don't worry about it. Seriously, shit happens. And yeah, it was...something.
[ He gestures for her to feel free to venture further inside, since they've mostly just been standing just inside his apartment, as he reaches for the basket. ]
Yeah, okay. Come on in. You know, you didn't have to do this. I would've forgiven you without it.
( he might say she didn't have to do it, but she knows she did. you don't just go and accuse a guy of having a secret kid with his boss and hope he forgets about it. you have to earn your forgiveness, and if caroline can't talk her way out of it, she's sure going to build an amazing gift basket. this one? it better be amazing, for how much time she spent in the gourmet food store aisles, looking for something that just screamed derek hale. )
I wanted to be sure. ( she could go sit, but it's more tempting instead to linger close, stay in a good spot to watch as he peels aside the outer layer of cellophane. ) Really. I wanted to do it.
[ While he's not sure why Caroline can't just take his word for it, he isn't going to argue. She certainly didn't have to do make such a gesture, but it is really sweet of her, so he takes the basket to the coffee table, dropping down on his couch unceremoniously, assuming he doesn't need to invite her to join him in addition to inviting her into the apartment. If she wants to sit, he just assumes that she will.
Peeling back the cellophane, the first thing he notices is the jerky and he can't help a little laugh that escapes him. His cousin had just been looking for jerky from the city and had totally gotten gypped; the irony isn't lost on him. ]
This is really thoughtful, Caroline, you didn't have to. Thank you. Very cool.
( no, she doesn't need an invitation. when he moves, it's only natural for caroline to follow, curling up beside him with her legs tucking underneath. and she's glad that he likes the items; she hadn't been a hundred percent certain he would, but her rule of thumb for gifts was always to go with something that reminded her of the recipient, and these had seemed fitting in that regard. )
It's not weird flavors or anything, right? I figured if anybody was going to like buffalo jerky, it'd be a wolf.
( as she says it, a smile tugs at the corner of her mouth. that little secret between them, the fact that they don't have to hide those parts of themselves... it had been a big part of the reason caroline had been so concerned about messing up their friendship in the first place.
his hands move to reveal other contents, and caroline laughs a bit, reaching over to pick up one of the packets and examining it a little more closely. )
God, alligator jerky. I don't even know how you would make alligator jerky...
I can't say I've ever tried buffalo jerky, but there's a first time for everything.
[ Plus, he and Malia can share, so there's always a plus there. If he doesn't like something, Malia will almost definitely eat it. It won't get wasted, at least. ]
I ... ( she hesitates for a moment, gaze flicking between the package in his fingertips and his own expression, before finally shrugging her shoulders. ) You know what, why not? What's the worst that can happen?
( after getting accustomed to the taste of blood, caroline's pretty sure a weird flavor of jerky won't be that strange in comparison. she can handle this. and, well, if she can't? she'll just have to rinse her mouth out. )
[ Derek can't help grinning at the moment of uncertainty before Caroline decides to throw caution to the wind to try a new type of jerky. He's glad he won't have to try it alone, in any case, because everything is better with someone else. Someone who's lived as lonely a life as Derek's last decade ought to know.
So he unwraps it and tears it in half, handing a piece to Caroline and keeping one for himself. ]
Worst that can happen is it's gross and we have to go get a drink to wash the taste away, right? Here goes nothing...
[ What he doesn't do is wait for Caroline to try hers before braving a bite of his own. ]
( but her complaint is minimal, just muttered under her breath as an aside, forgotten as soon as she bites into the stick. first impression? well, it's weird. it's not quite beef jerky, not quite the satisfying sensation of teeth digging in to flesh that she was expecting either; it's a strange feeling of almost sticky sinew dragging between her teeth and a flavor that's not really anything familiar. kind of like lamb, kind of like pork, but not. )
Um. ( a really concise opinion, clearly. but she's just not sure what to say, so taking another hesitant bite seems to be a better answer. ) I don't know whether this is good or bad or just too weird to be either, but I don't hate it?
You buy my gator jerky and I owe you a drink for letting you try some? I don't know about all that.
[ It's clear that he's joking, if not by the grin on his face, then by the fact that he's nodding; they've gone out for drinks before and he had a good time. There's no reason they can't do it again, as far as Derek is concerned.
The jerky is...actually not that bad. It isn't what he's expecting, but then again he's not really sure what he was expecting in the first place. It's not amazing; nothing to write home about, but he does sort of wish he'd left a little piece for Malia to try, now that he thinks about it. Oh well. There are plenty of others. ]
Yeah, that's kind of where I'm at, too, actually... Not bad, though. Not great, but not bad, either.
Maybe I just wanted an excuse to have another drink with you.
( that's true, at least. and they don't even have to go out for drinks, technically. caroline has a brand new bottle of bourbon for just this kind of occasion resting atop her dresser... which, if they were going to share, she'd probably move into the living room so as not to seem super weird. because, all said and done, it is pretty weird to keep your liquor in your bedroom. )
I think I'll skip another jerky sampling, though, if that's okay. I don't think it's my thing.
Well maybe I would rather we try something different this time.
[ Derek doesn't necessarily want to give Caroline the wrong idea, because he hasn't really decided how he feels about where they're going, but he also doesn't want to blow her off, because Derek thinks that the key to finding out how he feels about it is to get to know her some more. He can't do that if they're not hanging out. Realistically, he's probably just looking for a friendship out of all of this, but she's certainly attractive to him, so he's not ruling something else out. At least not now, if she's willing to give him more time to feel it out. ]
That's cool, I'll let you off the hook for it. My cousin will probably want to share these, so I'll save it for her.
[ He pauses a little before continuing. ]
So, what do you think? Dinner? Beach? Something a little more out of the box?
( she likes him. that much she knows. but knowing how she feels — even recognizing those feelings as just past the surface, still shallow, more of a crush than anything else at this point — doesn't quite absolve the lingering knowledge in the back of her mind that nothing, not even this place, will really last.
eternity is a long time, and considering even mortal marriages often take a stumble after a few dozen (or even just a few) years, caroline doesn't have much hope in the way of eternal love. or, for that matter, eternal liking. she can't even think up a single set of parents in mystic falls who managed to stay together completely. even the ones who were still married were apart emotionally.
so, here, in a place that's intended to be temporary, caroline's not sure how she feels about the idea of moving past anything but casual and contemporary. friends with benefits, casual hook-ups, mutually consenting rolls in the hay — she's here for it. and if derek just wants to be friends, she'll deal with it. she's learned to handle rejection a little better, after all, thanks to a certain salvatore brother back home.
her answer takes a moment, hands occupied with sweeping the detritus from her lap, but it comes out. eventually. )
I used to love going to Virginia Beach when I was a kid, but I haven't been in years. I didn't even pack a swim suit. Which I guess rules that idea out...
( her nose wrinkles for a moment, just briefly, before a bright laugh washes the expression away. )
[ In Derek's defense, he's at least aware of what's happening in the conversation this time. It's taken a turn and he's being invited to test the boundaries of the relationship between the two of them, moving the needle from friendship toward something a little less platonic.
He finds himself wondering when he'll stop feeling guilty for feeling more inclined to turning down that sort of invitation when it comes up. Today is apparently not that day. ]
We don't have to go swimming to enjoy the beach, you know. There's a lot to be said about the cliche walk on the beach at night. It's actually really peaceful...
[ It's a soft decline, because he does like the idea of going to the beach, but it feels uncomfortable to think about following up his date with Claire with the exact same activity with Caroline. Something tells him that if either of them found out about the other, at best, they'd think he was pretty tacky, even if he hadn't been the one to come up with the idea in either of the instances. ]
( don't worry, derek. she's not offended. in fact, caroline's pretty obviously relieved by the fact that he's not taking her up on the offer. she'd have done it if he'd have been gung ho about the idea, but it had mostly been a joke, a thought that had been blurted out before she'd had the chance to really think about it. )
A walk on the beach doesn't sound terrible. As long as you promise I won't wind up going home with sand everywhere.
( the last time she'd gone to the beach, she'd been unlucky enough to find it in her things for days and even weeks later. she'd like to avoid that, if at all possible. )
[ It's the relief he senses washing over her that ultimately relieves Derek himself of the guilty feeling enveloping him at the rejection to the offer. This? This is better.
A little laugh escapes him and he shrugs. ]
I can only promise that if you promise not to sit down to take a break.
[ Or take off her shoes or put down a bag or lean down to touch the wet sand because how can you not lean down to touch the wet sand when it looks so inviting, like it's begging for your handprint to interrupt the smooth surface? ]
So what you're telling me is you can't promise me I won't leave with sand everywhere.
( which means she's going to have to rinse it off somehow before actually going back inside her own apartment. or his, for that matter. maybe she could leave something here, and then use that as an excuse to track back to his apartment to shower after a beach outing. then all the sand would be in his apartment instead of hers. now that's a thought. )
How about this: you promise not to put sand in my hair, and I'll promise not to track too much of it through your place afterwards?
[ Again, Derek's initial response is a laugh and a shrug. ]
Yeah, sorry, that's pretty much what I'm saying. At least you won't get it anywhere too uncomfortable, though, right?
[ Because that is definitely a real risk while spending time at the beach, at least in bathing suits or naked, in his experience. ]
That is a promise I can keep, so yes. I promise not to put any sand in your hair and as long as you're not intentionally tracking in the entire beach, I'm pretty sure a broom will do the trick, so we're good, there.
[ Derek offers her a smile then and starts to re-wrap the jerky so that he can put it away. ]
So, we're cool? You're not still mad at me for having kids when I don't have kids, right?
( it seems like such a silly thing to say, but that doesn't make her answer any less genuine. if she had really been mad at him, she wouldn't have come by. she definitely wouldn't have gone to the trouble of making him a werewolf-friendly gift basket. )
It's kind of ridiculous to be mad at you, anyway, just because you're good with a baby. ( a self-deprecating little laugh, and caroline shakes her head. ) You know, I've been trying to keep it together, but I guess now you know the real Caroline Forbes... an insecure, neurotic, control freak who overreacts to everything.
( it wasn't that long ago that she panicked and shouted those words at stefan instead. it's easier to admit it, now, and easier to smile as she does. she can't even pretend to be anybody else, especially not with derek. he'd see right through it. )
[ Derek smiles a little at her response. Admittedly, he's relieved. He likes Caroline; she gets him, because she's kind of like him. It's nice to have a friend that is a little closer to his age and isn't from home who still understands what it's like to be him, at least to some degree. He'd honestly been put out rather a lot when he'd thought she was angry with him, so it's nice to know that she isn't, anymore. ]
I really like kids, that's all.
[ He hopes to have several of his own some day, but honestly, Derek's really not holding his breath for that one. If he can't even trust enough to sleep with someone here, he's certainly never going to trust someone enough to have children with them. Still, having Baby as a baby was a nice way to live vicariously through himself and it's nice to dream sometimes. He just...won't tell anyone.
Another smile crosses his expression and he shakes his head, as if to dismiss her summary of herself as unimportant. To him, it kind of is. ]
You're all right, Caroline. You might not be able to see it all the time, but the paranoid control freak that I am totally gets it. We're good, I promise.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
but blaming the city doesn't mean she doesn't feel a little — okay, a lot — guilty for basically accusing derek of lying to her. and when caroline feels guilty, she does her best to squash that feeling by doing something, anything to make things right.
so, naturally, pan to the next possible evening, and a blonde girl standing in front of derek's door, an oversized gift basket in hand. knock, knock. )
no subject
So, he doesn't think much of it as he tugs a t-shirt on, still a little sweaty from the workout he's been doing, using doorways for pull-ups, and crosses the room to answer the door.
He does not, however, expect to see Caroline on the other side of the door, especially after the blow up over the baby who had turned out not even to be a baby at all, just a guy called Baby stuck in a toddler's body. ]
...hey.
[ His eyes shift to the gift basket before they move back up to her face and he smiles a little, stepping back and gesturing for her to come on in, if she feels so inclined. ]
Did you decide I'm not such a shitbag after all?
no subject
I never thought you were a shitbag... ( fingertips brush a lock of hair out of her face, and she offers a weak smile in return. ) If anyone's a jerk, it's me.
( hence the gift basket. )
I was hoping you'd accept my apology, because I'd be really bummed if you went out of your way not to ghost on me and then I screwed it up because a magical puddle made me hear voices...
no subject
No? Just a liar.
[ He smiles a little, though, shaking his head. ]
Apology accepted. This place...just consider yourself lucky you were just hearing voices instead of word vomiting too much information at anyone in your general proximity who happens to be listening. That was fun, the truth rain. Were you here for that?
no subject
Don't remind me. I still feel like such a jerk.
( but he's accepting her somewhat lame not-quite-apology, so that does help her feel a little bit better about the whole thing. )
That sounds weird... though I probably don't need truth rain to wordvomit at people. ( embarassing, but true. ) You want to take a look at that basket? I kind of spent all day trying to find things I thought you'd like, but if you hate it, I can go back and get you something else...
no subject
Don't worry about it. Seriously, shit happens. And yeah, it was...something.
[ He gestures for her to feel free to venture further inside, since they've mostly just been standing just inside his apartment, as he reaches for the basket. ]
Yeah, okay. Come on in. You know, you didn't have to do this. I would've forgiven you without it.
no subject
I wanted to be sure. ( she could go sit, but it's more tempting instead to linger close, stay in a good spot to watch as he peels aside the outer layer of cellophane. ) Really. I wanted to do it.
no subject
Peeling back the cellophane, the first thing he notices is the jerky and he can't help a little laugh that escapes him. His cousin had just been looking for jerky from the city and had totally gotten gypped; the irony isn't lost on him. ]
This is really thoughtful, Caroline, you didn't have to. Thank you. Very cool.
no subject
It's not weird flavors or anything, right? I figured if anybody was going to like buffalo jerky, it'd be a wolf.
( as she says it, a smile tugs at the corner of her mouth. that little secret between them, the fact that they don't have to hide those parts of themselves... it had been a big part of the reason caroline had been so concerned about messing up their friendship in the first place.
his hands move to reveal other contents, and caroline laughs a bit, reaching over to pick up one of the packets and examining it a little more closely. )
God, alligator jerky. I don't even know how you would make alligator jerky...
no subject
[ Plus, he and Malia can share, so there's always a plus there. If he doesn't like something, Malia will almost definitely eat it. It won't get wasted, at least. ]
Hey, maybe it's amazing, you don't know.
[ He pulls that one out and lifts an eyebrow. ]
You feeling brave? Want to try it with me?
no subject
( after getting accustomed to the taste of blood, caroline's pretty sure a weird flavor of jerky won't be that strange in comparison. she can handle this. and, well, if she can't? she'll just have to rinse her mouth out. )
Hit me.
no subject
So he unwraps it and tears it in half, handing a piece to Caroline and keeping one for himself. ]
Worst that can happen is it's gross and we have to go get a drink to wash the taste away, right? Here goes nothing...
[ What he doesn't do is wait for Caroline to try hers before braving a bite of his own. ]
no subject
( but her complaint is minimal, just muttered under her breath as an aside, forgotten as soon as she bites into the stick. first impression? well, it's weird. it's not quite beef jerky, not quite the satisfying sensation of teeth digging in to flesh that she was expecting either; it's a strange feeling of almost sticky sinew dragging between her teeth and a flavor that's not really anything familiar. kind of like lamb, kind of like pork, but not. )
Um. ( a really concise opinion, clearly. but she's just not sure what to say, so taking another hesitant bite seems to be a better answer. ) I don't know whether this is good or bad or just too weird to be either, but I don't hate it?
no subject
[ It's clear that he's joking, if not by the grin on his face, then by the fact that he's nodding; they've gone out for drinks before and he had a good time. There's no reason they can't do it again, as far as Derek is concerned.
The jerky is...actually not that bad. It isn't what he's expecting, but then again he's not really sure what he was expecting in the first place. It's not amazing; nothing to write home about, but he does sort of wish he'd left a little piece for Malia to try, now that he thinks about it. Oh well. There are plenty of others. ]
Yeah, that's kind of where I'm at, too, actually... Not bad, though. Not great, but not bad, either.
no subject
( that's true, at least. and they don't even have to go out for drinks, technically. caroline has a brand new bottle of bourbon for just this kind of occasion resting atop her dresser... which, if they were going to share, she'd probably move into the living room so as not to seem super weird. because, all said and done, it is pretty weird to keep your liquor in your bedroom. )
I think I'll skip another jerky sampling, though, if that's okay. I don't think it's my thing.
no subject
[ He grins a little and gives a facial shrug. ]
Well maybe I would rather we try something different this time.
[ Derek doesn't necessarily want to give Caroline the wrong idea, because he hasn't really decided how he feels about where they're going, but he also doesn't want to blow her off, because Derek thinks that the key to finding out how he feels about it is to get to know her some more. He can't do that if they're not hanging out. Realistically, he's probably just looking for a friendship out of all of this, but she's certainly attractive to him, so he's not ruling something else out. At least not now, if she's willing to give him more time to feel it out. ]
That's cool, I'll let you off the hook for it. My cousin will probably want to share these, so I'll save it for her.
[ He pauses a little before continuing. ]
So, what do you think? Dinner? Beach? Something a little more out of the box?
[ His eyebrows lift with question. ]
no subject
eternity is a long time, and considering even mortal marriages often take a stumble after a few dozen (or even just a few) years, caroline doesn't have much hope in the way of eternal love. or, for that matter, eternal liking. she can't even think up a single set of parents in mystic falls who managed to stay together completely. even the ones who were still married were apart emotionally.
so, here, in a place that's intended to be temporary, caroline's not sure how she feels about the idea of moving past anything but casual and contemporary. friends with benefits, casual hook-ups, mutually consenting rolls in the hay — she's here for it. and if derek just wants to be friends, she'll deal with it. she's learned to handle rejection a little better, after all, thanks to a certain salvatore brother back home.
her answer takes a moment, hands occupied with sweeping the detritus from her lap, but it comes out. eventually. )
I used to love going to Virginia Beach when I was a kid, but I haven't been in years. I didn't even pack a swim suit. Which I guess rules that idea out...
( her nose wrinkles for a moment, just briefly, before a bright laugh washes the expression away. )
Well, unless you want to go skinny dipping.
no subject
He finds himself wondering when he'll stop feeling guilty for feeling more inclined to turning down that sort of invitation when it comes up. Today is apparently not that day. ]
We don't have to go swimming to enjoy the beach, you know. There's a lot to be said about the cliche walk on the beach at night. It's actually really peaceful...
[ It's a soft decline, because he does like the idea of going to the beach, but it feels uncomfortable to think about following up his date with Claire with the exact same activity with Caroline. Something tells him that if either of them found out about the other, at best, they'd think he was pretty tacky, even if he hadn't been the one to come up with the idea in either of the instances. ]
Want to...?
no subject
A walk on the beach doesn't sound terrible. As long as you promise I won't wind up going home with sand everywhere.
( the last time she'd gone to the beach, she'd been unlucky enough to find it in her things for days and even weeks later. she'd like to avoid that, if at all possible. )
no subject
A little laugh escapes him and he shrugs. ]
I can only promise that if you promise not to sit down to take a break.
[ Or take off her shoes or put down a bag or lean down to touch the wet sand because how can you not lean down to touch the wet sand when it looks so inviting, like it's begging for your handprint to interrupt the smooth surface? ]
no subject
( which means she's going to have to rinse it off somehow before actually going back inside her own apartment. or his, for that matter. maybe she could leave something here, and then use that as an excuse to track back to his apartment to shower after a beach outing. then all the sand would be in his apartment instead of hers. now that's a thought. )
How about this: you promise not to put sand in my hair, and I'll promise not to track too much of it through your place afterwards?
no subject
Yeah, sorry, that's pretty much what I'm saying. At least you won't get it anywhere too uncomfortable, though, right?
[ Because that is definitely a real risk while spending time at the beach, at least in bathing suits or naked, in his experience. ]
That is a promise I can keep, so yes. I promise not to put any sand in your hair and as long as you're not intentionally tracking in the entire beach, I'm pretty sure a broom will do the trick, so we're good, there.
[ Derek offers her a smile then and starts to re-wrap the jerky so that he can put it away. ]
So, we're cool? You're not still mad at me for having kids when I don't have kids, right?
no subject
( it seems like such a silly thing to say, but that doesn't make her answer any less genuine. if she had really been mad at him, she wouldn't have come by. she definitely wouldn't have gone to the trouble of making him a werewolf-friendly gift basket. )
It's kind of ridiculous to be mad at you, anyway, just because you're good with a baby. ( a self-deprecating little laugh, and caroline shakes her head. ) You know, I've been trying to keep it together, but I guess now you know the real Caroline Forbes... an insecure, neurotic, control freak who overreacts to everything.
( it wasn't that long ago that she panicked and shouted those words at stefan instead. it's easier to admit it, now, and easier to smile as she does. she can't even pretend to be anybody else, especially not with derek. he'd see right through it. )
no subject
I really like kids, that's all.
[ He hopes to have several of his own some day, but honestly, Derek's really not holding his breath for that one. If he can't even trust enough to sleep with someone here, he's certainly never going to trust someone enough to have children with them. Still, having Baby as a baby was a nice way to live vicariously through himself and it's nice to dream sometimes. He just...won't tell anyone.
Another smile crosses his expression and he shakes his head, as if to dismiss her summary of herself as unimportant. To him, it kind of is. ]
You're all right, Caroline. You might not be able to see it all the time, but the paranoid control freak that I am totally gets it. We're good, I promise.