[Well, this is already going smashingly, isn't it? He doesn't want to argue, so he switches from text to video. The person on the video definitely looks like Diego. Sounds like him. But there seems to be something causing a lens flare at the eyes.]
[ When the messages switch format, Derek's eyes are narrowed as his camera starts sending feed. The last time they talked, they texted their conversation — any time they've talked, they've texted, actually — and, more importantly, they'd been fighting. Ugly things were said. Feelings were hurt. Prides were bruised. He'd been pretty sure that their friendship had imploded and there wasn't going to be any fixing it.
This sort of turnaround isn't reassuring. In fact, it's off-putting and it tells him that something's very wrong with this picture. ]
Believe it or not, no. Not really. The hell is going on with your eyes?
I don't know-- they were just like this when I woke up. [That's sort of true. His eyes have always been this way, since the moment the fog rolled in and he came to exist. The shadow isn't concerned entirely with Derek believing he is Diego, more than he is that he understands that his counterpart does feel this way. But that doesn't mean he won't try to go for broke and convince him anyway.]
[ Something did. There's no way Diego's just infodumping on him like that for no reason, especially when most of the context of it is the sort of thing he can't in a million years envision Diego actually saying. ]
Nothing. Nothing's happened, I just-- needed you to understand.
[There's a softness in his voice that Derek has definitely never heard, a sound usually designated for Mom; and there's a sort of desperation at that notion.]
You're one of the only friends I've got-- I don't want to lose that.
[ That softness in Diego's tone actually makes Derek angry. It's insulting that whatever this thing is, it thinks that Derek doesn't know Diego well enough to know that that's not Diego. ]
Why the sudden change of heart?
[ He wants nothing more than to eviscerate the fake, but if he does that too soon, then he won't find the real one. The irony of the fact that Derek knows that something is wrong when Diego is being too open and that Diego apparently didn't realize something was wrong when Derek uncharacteristically blew him off is not lost on Derek, he's just not willing to acknowledge it at the moment. He can be pissed off about that later. ]
I thought you would appreciate getting the real feelings behind your friend's actions. [There's a short, almost mocking laugh.] How much do you know about him, anyway? Not enough, if you don't know he's constantly worried about not being good enough.
Who am I? I am Diego Hargreeves' true self. The literal embodiment of the worst parts of himself he hates, but can never get rid of.
[There's another laugh, hollow and empty and mocking.] If you want to know how he really feels, I'm the one to ask, now, before the opportunity is gone. I'll tell you e v e r y t h i n g. [He draws out that last word, slowly enough to be enticing.]
[ Derek's face shifts, expression openly angry now, eyes flashing. His voice is low and gravely, but it's not quiet; it's loud and just this side of shouting. ]
Where is he? I don't care who you are. Where's Diego?
[ Flashbacks to being thrown into a wall by what looked, smelled, and felt like Stiles crop up in Derek's mind and he tries to remember whether the nogitsune's voice could do that, too. Because the rest? The rest sounds like a nogitsune who thinks Derek doesn't know any better and, if that's the case, this thing is sorely mistaken. ]
Oh, don't worry, he hasn't gone anywhere. There's just two of us now. Unless he can accept me, I'm not going anywhere, any time soon.
[His voice is almost sing-song, the smirk on his face twisted just sharp enough to not sit quite right.]
It's sad, really, the way you instantly shift to worry and concern, and he only got mad and insecure and assumed the worst out of you.
[There's a soft click of his tongue and he shakes his head.]
See, that's his problem-- he thinks he can hide behind the mask of anger, but I am so close to the surface all the time about everything and I rule him more than anything else... He sees me as a risk he can't take, but what he doesn't understand is the more he denies me, the stronger I become.
[Especially now that he's manifested as a true Shadow. Every time Diego denies things within himself, the Shadow can feel it solidifying his state here.]
[ It feels like a low blow and that's partially because Derek knows it's meant to be. His jaw clenches and his finger hovers over the icon that'll end the video call entirely. Derek's fully aware of the fact that he's concerned when something seems off and Diego decided Derek was just an asshole when something felt off to him. He doesn't need this thing wearing Diego's face to remind him. ]
People have assumed worse things about me, believe me.
[ His tone carries both bitterness and sarcasm in equal measure, but it conveys the truth. He'd rather Diego think he's an asshole than an entire town he'd spent his life trying to protect assume that he's a murderer.
The more this thing talks, though, the more Derek starts to worry what caused it. What made that thing show up? What made it split off of Diego or take over Diego or whatever the fuck it's doing? ...and what can Derek do to prevent it happening to him, too? If there's one way to blow his chances at a new start, people hearing something wearing his face telling everyone his business like this. Nobody would ever talk to him again if they knew the choices that he made and the consequences that came with them...
He's trying so hard not to look as afraid of that prospect as he is. ]
Where did you come from? [ Unspoken translation: I need somewhere to start researching so that I can kill you and go back to being mad at Diego instead of worrying about his well-being. ]
[That isn't what Derek means, and the Shadow knows it. But... well, this is more fun.]
Maybe if you're lucky, you can talk him into accepting me... But-- I guess you aren't really on speaking terms at the moment, are you? [There's another laugh, almost viscous this time.]
That decision is plenty mutual, let me assure you.
[ His eyes narrow before rolling. What was it Diego had said? He didn't realize that Derek couldn't handle his own shit? Maybe Diego should just handle his own, from the sounds of things. ]
Well, are we finished here? There's nothing I can do to help him and you're not him, so I feel like we're both just wasting an awful lot of one another's time here, aren't we?
[The Shadow almost sounds impressed. He'd rather this be Derek's choice, in all truth. It only manages to work in his favor.]
Just remember this: Nothing I've said is a lie. I'm just as much a part of him as anything else he's told you. And he's distressed at the idea that he fucked up enough with you that you'll never talk to him again.
Well, he might not be wrong. I haven't decided, yet. You wanna make yourself useful? Tell him to pull his head out of his ass and apologize and we're good. That's it. That's all it would take. But if you're not actually interested in making yourself useful, then fuck off, all right? You're not doing either of us any favors.
[The Shadow is gone, but the mess it left behind didn't disappear with it. Diego never noticed these texts, because he had no reason to open his messages with Derek, since they weren't exactly on speaking terms.
At some point, he taps the wrong thing and the window pops up on the screen anyway and he sees some texts he doesn't recall sending. Scrolls back up to the top of the conversation and reads through it, watches the recorded feed of video.
And kind of wants to fucking die on the spot.
He presses his palms to his eyes and lets out a frustrated groan at the conversation he just witnessed between that stupid fucking doppelganger and his friend. He hates more than anything that it was right-- nothing it told Derek was untrue. Maybe expounded on, exaggerated for effect or something, but... not a lie. Not any of it.
He tries, more than once, to send a text to Derek. 'Hey', 'What's up''I'm an asshole', anything at all.
But he doesn't, in the end. Can't quite bring himself to it at all.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Who else would it be?
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video;
Is this proof enough for you?
video;
This sort of turnaround isn't reassuring. In fact, it's off-putting and it tells him that something's very wrong with this picture. ]
Believe it or not, no. Not really. The hell is going on with your eyes?
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What happened to you last night, then?
[ Something did. There's no way Diego's just infodumping on him like that for no reason, especially when most of the context of it is the sort of thing he can't in a million years envision Diego actually saying. ]
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[There's a softness in his voice that Derek has definitely never heard, a sound usually designated for Mom; and there's a sort of desperation at that notion.]
You're one of the only friends I've got-- I don't want to lose that.
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Why the sudden change of heart?
[ He wants nothing more than to eviscerate the fake, but if he does that too soon, then he won't find the real one. The irony of the fact that Derek knows that something is wrong when Diego is being too open and that Diego apparently didn't realize something was wrong when Derek uncharacteristically blew him off is not lost on Derek, he's just not willing to acknowledge it at the moment. He can be pissed off about that later. ]
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There's an odd, double-echo sound to the words that come next.]
I thought you would appreciate getting the real feelings behind your friend's actions. [There's a short, almost mocking laugh.] How much do you know about him, anyway? Not enough, if you don't know he's constantly worried about not being good enough.
Who am I? I am Diego Hargreeves' true self. The literal embodiment of the worst parts of himself he hates, but can never get rid of.
[There's another laugh, hollow and empty and mocking.] If you want to know how he really feels, I'm the one to ask, now, before the opportunity is gone. I'll tell you e v e r y t h i n g. [He draws out that last word, slowly enough to be enticing.]
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Where is he? I don't care who you are. Where's Diego?
[ Flashbacks to being thrown into a wall by what looked, smelled, and felt like Stiles crop up in Derek's mind and he tries to remember whether the nogitsune's voice could do that, too. Because the rest? The rest sounds like a nogitsune who thinks Derek doesn't know any better and, if that's the case, this thing is sorely mistaken. ]
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[His voice is almost sing-song, the smirk on his face twisted just sharp enough to not sit quite right.]
It's sad, really, the way you instantly shift to worry and concern, and he only got mad and insecure and assumed the worst out of you.
[There's a soft click of his tongue and he shakes his head.]
See, that's his problem-- he thinks he can hide behind the mask of anger, but I am so close to the surface all the time about everything and I rule him more than anything else... He sees me as a risk he can't take, but what he doesn't understand is the more he denies me, the stronger I become.
[Especially now that he's manifested as a true Shadow. Every time Diego denies things within himself, the Shadow can feel it solidifying his state here.]
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People have assumed worse things about me, believe me.
[ His tone carries both bitterness and sarcasm in equal measure, but it conveys the truth. He'd rather Diego think he's an asshole than an entire town he'd spent his life trying to protect assume that he's a murderer.
The more this thing talks, though, the more Derek starts to worry what caused it. What made that thing show up? What made it split off of Diego or take over Diego or whatever the fuck it's doing? ...and what can Derek do to prevent it happening to him, too? If there's one way to blow his chances at a new start, people hearing something wearing his face telling everyone his business like this. Nobody would ever talk to him again if they knew the choices that he made and the consequences that came with them...
He's trying so hard not to look as afraid of that prospect as he is. ]
Where did you come from? [ Unspoken translation: I need somewhere to start researching so that I can kill you and go back to being mad at Diego instead of worrying about his well-being. ]
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[That isn't what Derek means, and the Shadow knows it. But... well, this is more fun.]
Maybe if you're lucky, you can talk him into accepting me... But-- I guess you aren't really on speaking terms at the moment, are you? [There's another laugh, almost viscous this time.]
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[ His eyes narrow before rolling. What was it Diego had said? He didn't realize that Derek couldn't handle his own shit? Maybe Diego should just handle his own, from the sounds of things. ]
Well, are we finished here? There's nothing I can do to help him and you're not him, so I feel like we're both just wasting an awful lot of one another's time here, aren't we?
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[The Shadow almost sounds impressed. He'd rather this be Derek's choice, in all truth. It only manages to work in his favor.]
Just remember this: Nothing I've said is a lie. I'm just as much a part of him as anything else he's told you. And he's distressed at the idea that he fucked up enough with you that you'll never talk to him again.
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[His voice is sing-song and he smirks before he disconnects the feed. Well, that was fun!]
reaction only » 10/26
At some point, he taps the wrong thing and the window pops up on the screen anyway and he sees some texts he doesn't recall sending. Scrolls back up to the top of the conversation and reads through it, watches the recorded feed of video.
And kind of wants to fucking die on the spot.
He presses his palms to his eyes and lets out a frustrated groan at the conversation he just witnessed between that stupid fucking doppelganger and his friend. He hates more than anything that it was right-- nothing it told Derek was untrue. Maybe expounded on, exaggerated for effect or something, but... not a lie. Not any of it.
He tries, more than once, to send a text to Derek. 'Hey', 'What's up' 'I'm an asshole', anything at all.
But he doesn't, in the end. Can't quite bring himself to it at all.]