[ It isn't an apology, but an apology from Diego feels like the kind of thing he'll only get if he reciprocates proactively. Those two questions, though, open a door and Derek sighs, scrubbing his face with both hands.
They mean Diego might not want to come out and say it, but he cares as much as Derek does. ...and they want the same thing. ]
Yeah. I'm bored of hating you. It got old.
[ That would've come with a smirk and a casual swig of beer if they were in the bar right now. ]
Sorry about the shitty things I said. I was just mad. I wasn't even that mad at you, I was just mad at other stuff and I took it out on you because you were there to take it out on.
[ At Vanya. At the train. At Leonard for making Vanya get on the train in the first place. At the universe for making him see Laura in pieces again. ]
[An out-and-out apology isn't probably something that will pass Diego's lips. He hasn't even truly done that with his own siblings and his innumerable discretions with them. But he can get close. Hopefully close enough that it can be accepted for one all the same, at least.
His lips twitch into a small smirk at that first remark.]
Good to know.
Don't worry about it, I get it. I didn't know where you were... and you weren't answering... and that really irrational part of my brain is really good at running away with the smallest assumptions. Yeah. I know the feeling. It's so much easier to just be angry.
[ That's about as close as he's going to get, Derek supposes. He guesses, if nothing else, the doppelganger was right about that.
Angry has always been easier. It's never smarter or more productive, but it's always easier. I get it.
You know, for the record...if I ever don't answer you in the future? Assume there's something wrong. I don't just blow people off. If I want them to fuck off, I'll be the first person to say so, man. I have no reason not to. Okay?
[They really were so much alike in so many ways. And still so incredibly different in others.]
Yeah, I... see that now. I'll keep it in mind, if there's a next time.
Hopefully there's not a next time, though.
[He wants to ask if they're still on for Friday, but he's not sure if he should. He's not sure they're that okay. He barely ever managed to trip his way around disagreements and arguments with Patch, and she's probably the most level-headed, patient person Diego has ever met in his life. Most people are not like that, and he really doesn't want to mess this already so taut and tentative thing up even further by stepping too far forward, too fast.]
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They mean Diego might not want to come out and say it, but he cares as much as Derek does. ...and they want the same thing. ]
Yeah. I'm bored of hating you. It got old.
[ That would've come with a smirk and a casual swig of beer if they were in the bar right now. ]
Sorry about the shitty things I said. I was just mad. I wasn't even that mad at you, I was just mad at other stuff and I took it out on you because you were there to take it out on.
[ At Vanya. At the train. At Leonard for making Vanya get on the train in the first place. At the universe for making him see Laura in pieces again. ]
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His lips twitch into a small smirk at that first remark.]
Good to know.
Don't worry about it, I get it.
I didn't know where you were... and you weren't answering... and that really irrational part of my brain is really good at running away with the smallest assumptions.
Yeah. I know the feeling. It's so much easier to just be angry.
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Angry has always been easier. It's never smarter or more productive, but it's always easier. I get it.
You know, for the record...if I ever don't answer you in the future? Assume there's something wrong. I don't just blow people off. If I want them to fuck off, I'll be the first person to say so, man. I have no reason not to. Okay?
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[They really were so much alike in so many ways. And still so incredibly different in others.]
Yeah, I... see that now. I'll keep it in mind, if there's a next time.
Hopefully there's not a next time, though.
[He wants to ask if they're still on for Friday, but he's not sure if he should. He's not sure they're that okay. He barely ever managed to trip his way around disagreements and arguments with Patch, and she's probably the most level-headed, patient person Diego has ever met in his life. Most people are not like that, and he really doesn't want to mess this already so taut and tentative thing up even further by stepping too far forward, too fast.]
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[ There's always a next time, though. It's just how it is. ]
But yeah, we're cool.
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[It's a solid fifteen minutes before he decides to just bite the bullet and ask.]
So... Friday?
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Yeah, obviously.
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Cool. See you then.
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